I’ve never had a massage. I mean, a real, professional massage. Not to suggest that I’ve gotten massages from random homeless men on the street, but I don’t consider Paul rubbing my shoulders when they are sore a massage.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is that Paul and I have some time off together at the end of the month, and briefly considered going away together, but decided that it might be better to have a “stay-cation” and do some fun local things. One of the things I suggested was getting a couples massage. Paul, of course, immediately poo poo’d it.

I was a little upset that he so quickly shut it down without giving a reason why. I have a funny feeling it has to do with, how should I put this, the small amount of hair growing on his back. (I’m over it.) But he would never admit that. It also upset me that the only suggestion he was making was to take a hot air balloon ride with our cat Jersey in a top hat.


He was serious.

About the cat in a hot air balloon.

So she could “see the world”.

In a top hat.

So today I researched some massages that I could go to myself. And my area of Northern New Jersey has what appear to be some nice spas. But since I’ve never had a massage, I don’t really know what I’m looking for. Do I just want a regular Swedish massage? Hot Stone? Aromatherapy?

And then, there is a spa nearby that has “Pacific Massages” and let me tell you, they sound delightful! The Lomi Lomi! The Jamu! They sound so tropical! I LOVE tropical! I have a tattoo of a hibiscus flower on my foot! That should surely get me a discount, right??? Massages with coconut oil and ylang-ylang flower essence and aloe, oh my!

Granted, these cost $120 for an hour, but I’m sure, somewhere in the recess of my mind, I can rationalize that it’s worth it, right?

And that’s the thing. I RARELY treat myself. I do my own nails. I get my hair cut twice a year (if that). I use coupons to get make up once a century. I buy shampoo in bulk. So really, I could go out and get myself a massage.

So, since I know I’m 99.999999% likely to talk myself out of it, could you please share your massage experience, what you’d recommend, and remind me why I need to pamper myself a little?

Thanks! Happy Tuesday!


Vacation Bucket List- Domestic Edition

Monday I wrote about all the places internationally that I want to visit before I die. Well, today, as it would make sense to write, I’m going to share with you the domestic locations that I’d like to visit. Enjoy!

  • Hawaii! Absolutely the #1 dream vacation spot on either list. This is where I want Paul and I to go on our honeymoon. I should probably start saving…
  • Grand Canyon. I will admit, I’ve always wanted to go there ever since this is Paul (not my Paul) went there in 5th grade and brought back a scorpion in a snow globe. I appreciated the irony even as a 10-year-old.
  • Seattle. Maybe it’s part Grey’s Anatomy, part Twilight, part Nirvana and part Starbucks, but I’ve always wanted to go.
  • San Diego. Maybe I’ll run into Mr. Mraz. My life would then be complete. Oh, and I use to LOVE Rainbow Brite’s San Diego Zoo Adventure when I was a kid! (Don’t deny- you watched it, too. And you LOVED IT!)
  • Those Arches in Utah. I don’t actually remember what they are called… or where they are located… but I’d like to see them before they all blow away.
  • Mt. Rushmore. Cause, you know, who doesn’t want to see giant heads in a mountain?
  • New Orleans. Now, technically, I’ve been there. But it was a port on a cruise (pre-Katrina) and I was 19. I’d like to go and stay for a few days as an adult.
  • Colorado. My dad was stationed in Colorado when he was in the Navy (I know, there are no oceans, I don’t get it either), and he has some pretty awesome stories, so I’d like to go.
  • Disney World. I was also here, but as a 5-year-old. I deserve to discover the magic of Disney as an adult who can remember more than 1 ride.
  • The Outer Banks. I feel like everyone I know has been here, except me. I’d like to see what all the fuss is about.
  • Vermont. I’d like to rent a ski cabin. My parents have great stories and memories from skiing in Vermont in the 70’s. I don’t ski, I roll down mountains, so I’d just like to rent the cabin and chill for a weekend.

And now for the places in the US that you’d have to drag me to kicking and screaming (mildly sarcastic over-exaggeration).

  • Boston. Nope. Sorry. I will NEVER willing go to the land of the evil, wicked (dialectal pun, intended), treacherous Red Sox. Oh, and the Patriots. The obnoxious, self-righteous Patriots. And the Celtics! It should be pronounced Kel-tics, not Sell-tics!
  • Chicago. Umm… I’m not sure what there is to do in Chicago besides go see Oprah, and that’s only for another year, so I’ll pass.
  • L.A. Yeah, no.
  • Texas. Yeah, double no.
  • Alaska. Ok, it’s cold. It’s far. There are Palins. Pass.
  • Miami. I dunno, I’m on the fence with Miami. I just feel like, I dunno, I’m too fat to go to Miami. I blame Burn Notice.

So that’s that. I fully acknowledge that I’m probably going to offend someone with this list. But they are my opinions. And really, the only place I refuse to go is Boston. And, if you’re a Yankee fan like me, you’ll get it.

Have a great day!

Vacation Bucket List- International Edition

So today, in salute to, well, nothing else to write about, I’m going to share with you all the places in the world I want to visit. I lied, this is in salute to something. It’s a salute to wanting to be anywhere else but work.

Ok so here’s the list, in no particular order, of places internationally I want to visit before I kick the bucket:

  • Ireland. Cause, you know, I’m Irish.
  • Scotland. Och. Eye. Haggas.
  • Latvia? I know, but if I’m including all the other nationalities that I am, I have to include this one, too.
  • Australia. Just ’cause. And to improve my imitation of their dialect. And to pay homage to Heath.
  • Italy. Sort of. Mainly cause I’m also Italian so I feel I have to want to visit there. Mostly Rome, though. Just for the history of it.
  • Spain. Ok, I really have no desire to go to Spain. But recently, I found out I’m also part spanish, so I suppose I should add it to my list of my heritage tour.
  • Greece. Think Mamma Mia. Throw in some Acropolis action and I’m hooked.
  • Costa Rica. This is a new addition to the list. Mostly because I saw some picks of a friends vaca there on facebook and it looked cool.
  • Germany. Cause, you know, I’m German, too.
  • Israel. Ok, I know this is a weird one, especially from the agnostic. But, I have always found religion interesting from an intellectual perspective, so I figure that would be the place to go to learn.
  • And back to England. I really need to get myself a scanner and upload all my pictures from when I was there in 2000. My favorite spot? The oh-so-now-touristy Warwick Castle. The day I was there was sunny and warm and there weren’t a lot of people, and I just thought the mix of history and the view from the ramparts was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen! Oh, and also there is a tavern in England named after my family, and I was too young the last time to find it, so that’s always a goal.

Now, with this said, I feel I should mention the places on earth that other, normal, people want to visit, but I have absolutely no desire to go to.

  • Africa. Nope. Sorry. Save your safari for some other chick. The Bronx Zoo works for me.
  • Mexico. I already shit too much as it is before you throw Montezuma’s Revenge in there…
  • Egypt. Yeah, pyramids. Mummies. While historically interesting, not really my thing.
  • India. Similar reason to Mexico. I can’t eat spicy food.
  • Great Wall of China. This is LaLa and Freckles pipe dream. Again, does nothing for me.
  • Japan. I never really had any interest in going there.

As you can see, I tend to want to visit places that have historical significance to me. I want to go to the places my ancestors walked. But, big touristy locations don’t really do much for me.

Now, Paul and I just need to make enough money to pay for all these romps! As my crazy week continues, I’ll be dreaming of these far away places, trust me!

I’ll Be Back

Ok peeps, I’m about to leave for the night and fight off the snow heading our way here in the land of Snookie.

I will be off-line for the next week because I’ll be on


Take care and I’ll fill you all in with all the goodies when I get back on the 15th!

Birthday Report, Vacation Countdown, and Cursing Blizzards!

I leave for vacation in 4 days!!! You don’t understand, I haven’t been on a real vacation since 2002, and, I’ve never been on a real vacation with a boyfriend, so I’m SUPER excited!

Have I told you yet what we’re doing? No? I can’t remember, and really don’t have the energy to look back, so I’ll tell you again:

Sunday- Sail out from Baltimore at 5pm.

Monday- Fun day at sea.

Tuesday- Fun day at sea.

Wednesday- Docking in Port Canaveral, Florida. Taking Surfing Lessons at Ron Jon Surf Shop! I’m SO excited about this!

Thursday- Docking in Nassau, Bahamas. Going to Atlantis and swimming with dolphins! Achoo is SO excited about this!

Friday- Docking in Freeport, Bahamas. Taking a catamaran out and going snorkeling.  Super fun!

Saturday- Another fun day at sea.

Sunday- Returning to Baltimore at 10am.

Isn’t that fabulous? I can’t wait. Now, with that said, all of this is dependent on the BLIZZARD  we are supposed to get Friday into Saturday. Of course, this also puts a damper on LiLi’s shower, which is scheduled for Saturday morning. LaLa is in panic mode over this, we’ve talked 4 times today already. But, I’ll say this, as long as I can physically and safely drive on Interstate 95 on Sunday morning and get to the port on time, I don’t really care what else happens. I paid a lot of money to go on this vacation, I will be going. Hell or high water. Or Blizzard.

Finally, I want to share with you some fun birthday updates. After work I went to Achoo’s and we went to this fabulous little Italian place for dinner. We ordered calamari as an appetizer and then I ordered chicken parm and Achoo ordered manicotti stuffed with meat. He ate all of his, I ate about a third of mine! But we took it home so he would have it for lunch today. We’re being smart!

After, we went back to his house and snuggled up and watched American Idol (love me some VBecks right now, except for the weird hair) and the first half of Lost (it started to snow and so I had to leave before I could watch the second half, bitches and hoes!).  But that’s exactly what I wanted for my birthday.

Finally, the icing on the cake, is my BEAUTIFUL birthday present, which made me cry, a lot:

The Key To His Heart!

The picture is a little fuzzy; the only thing I don’t like about my Blackberry; but you get the idea! It’s from Kay and I love it. Not to flashy, not too gaudy, not too expensive. I totally cheated and looked up how much it cost, and I feel pretty comfortable with how much he spent. If it had been more, I would have panicked over the unnecessary expense.

So that’s all for now. Pray for the snow to be lighter than expected (as of right now, over a foot! Not good!) and for my vacation to seem like it lasts forever!

Rants and Raves

Rant: Being in the office by yourself sucks. You have to rush to answer everyone’s phones, you can’t go to the bathroom, and its annoyingly hot.

Rave: I get to see almost all my favorite people on Sunday! Brunch with Queens, dress shopping with LaLa and LiLi, and then time in the evening with Achoo!

Rant: Traffic. Why was there an accident EVERY DAY THIS WEEK on the Garden State Parkway during my drive to work? Safety first, people!

Rave: I heart American Idol. I know less people are watching now, with the absence of Paula and the Simon leaving thing, but I still love it. I love seeing the good singers rock, and I love even more when they overcome obstacles. Although the auditions are interesting, I can’t wait to see the actual live singing!

Rant: American Idol pisses me off. First of all, you kind of know for sure if someone makes it if they do an “at home” piece on them, like the girl from Tennessee last night (who I thought was so cute in her $4.95 Dollar Store dress!) So what annoys me is that you know who’s going to be terrible and who’s going to be good, for the most part. I just wish there was a little more mystery.

Rave: Achoo. He made me forget all about my stupid ex getting engaged last night. I obviously didn’t mention it to him, but just being in his presence reminded me how wonderful he is and how lucky I am to have him in my life.

Plus, for some reason I don’t understand, he was horny despite my cold and amazingly enough, sex cleared out all my congestion! I could breathe after!

Rant: Achoo’s haircut. he likes it short, I like it longer and spiky (do does his mom). He got it cut yesterday. I’m glad he did now, though, so it’ll be spiky again by the cruise.

Rave: We go on our cruise in 24 days! OMG I can’t believe its so close! I might have to go to Target next week and buy a new bathing suit or wrap to take with me. I also need to get my suitcase from my parent’s house.

Rant: I’m tired. For the past 2 weeks, I’ve worked 9-5, which is normal to most, but tough when you’re driving over an hour (with aforementioned traffic) in the morning and to get home. Luckily, Wednesday of next week I resume my 11-7 schedule. Although I’m not a fan of working until 7, and when the students get back I’ll have a lot of outside events, at least I’ll get to sleep a little later.

Rave: I just found out I have Monday off. My boss had no idea the school was closed on Monday! So yay for 3-day weekends!

Holy Busyness, Batman! (And Some New Years Stuff)

Inhale. Exhale. This is the first time this week that I’ve gotten a chance to write. Can you believe it?

We came back from our Holiday break with a mission, I suppose, and I’ve been working non-stop since Monday. I’m starting to get more responsibility at work, which is good, and keeping busy is good, but, damn, I haven’t had a moment to catch my breath!

I don’t really do resolutions, but I have set a couple of goals for the next few months, so let me share:

  1. Achoo and I leave for our cruise in exactly 1 month! So, I’d like to lose about 8-10lbs in that month. I think that is doable! It would be enough that I’d feel comfy in my summer clothes (aka bathing suit) and not feel like a complete beached whale when I have to don wetsuits 2 days in a row for our various activities.
  2. Find an apartment. Achoo and I looked at one last night that was very promising. We talked about it, and we’ve decided to go for a March 1st move in, so that will give us a little more time to save and prepare. It isn’t really practical for us to move in February 1st when we’re leaving for 7 days a week later. Why pay rent when we’re not living there?
  3. Save Money. The ongoing battle. I’ve been doing pretty good with this, actually, and since I’ve started my new job, I’ve added $500 to my savings account! Which, I know, isn’t amazing, but considering it’s more than I saved in all of 2008, I’ll take it. If I can keep that up, saving anywhere from $200-$250 a month, I’ll be happy. The goal is to eventually be able to buy a house!

That’s pretty much it. I don’t really consider them “resolutions”, because they are goals that I set for myself last year, I’m just continuing them.

Finally, Achoo got a call the other day for a possible job. I can’t really go into the details about who it’s with, because that would be jinxing it, but, he had a phone interview yesterday, and hopefully he’ll get the call next week to go and interview in person. He’d be making about $7,000 more a year, which would be really helpful with goal #3 and the house thing!

Hopefully I’ll be able to take a breather the next couple days and actually write. I’ve got some fun ideas for topics, so stay tuned!